I am standing in line behind three people of varying age, “fitness,” and “sexiness.” The woman at the front of the line is young, but otherwise is on the “losing end” of all of these spectra. She is wearing large sweatpants that have the word “pink” printed across the back. She is wearing a large sweatshirt that has the words “SUNY Albany” printed across the back. Her voice is “classless.” She orders a “large caramel supreme latte with extra whipped cream and caramel sauce.” That is the same drink that I wanted to order. I watch her put extra whipped cream and caramel sauce inside her body. Her tongue is thick. I order a small black coffee and walk away without tipping.